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    I am incredibly privileged in several respects, but most so in that I don’t have to have a job to keep a (pretty nice) roof over our heads.

    This is fortunate for several reasons, not the least of which is because I am a fat woman. My BMI, for those who still put faith in a measurement so increasingly seen as outdated and unhelpful, is 40. My body fat percentage, as measured by a smart scale (Fitbit Aria), is 46.0% as of Sunday. This means that if I interviewed for jobs, my admitted lack of qualifications would be secondary to my appearance. Fortunately, I’m a white woman, so I have a chance, however small, of being hired.

    But I would likely still face what Sarah Hollowell did, to some degree. I’m very glad Roxane Gay stood up for her. This thread, and especially some of the replies, are both sad and enraging.


    So I managed a 5-day streak, but that was it. I haven’t gotten much of any of my goals in the time since.

    But y’know what? I’m not stressing it. I have permission from myself to half-ass through the holidays. It’s cold, it gets dark early, and I’m allowed not to freak out about making goals every day. I am doing better about getting more steps in, and more hours with 250+ steps. All I need to do is better over all.

    Third Time’s The Charm?

    Day three! Each day I’ve also gotten all 12 hours with 250+ steps and more than 36 oz. of water. I’m feelin’ streaky.

    Oops (not really) I Did It Again

    Two day streak.

    Back on the Horse… er, Gazelle

    Something like twelve years ago, I got a Gazelle Edge glider. I used it with varying frequency until a few months ago, when I got a Freestyle. There were a few reasons for this. The “fitness computer” which is a basic recorder of time, distance, estimated calorie burn, etc. had long since gone kaput on the Edge, and it was actually only rated for a maximum weight of 250 pounds, which exceeded for several years. It still worked, but it squeaked and squealed. So I got the Freestyle, which is rated for 300 pounds, has a water bottle holder and a working “fitness computer” (with a thumb pulse monitor! woo!). The water bottle holder also ends up being a convenient mounting spot for my phone.


    All this has combined to make it much easier for me to actually get a good workout in. The problem is that I’ve got to step on the damned thing for it to work. And I haven’t been for a couple weeks now. But I got back on it today. And I was on it for a bit over 20 minutes, which, combined with the few minutes I’d spent doing a couple of other things that raised my heart-rate, ended up garnering me 32 active minutes (i.e. with my heart rate above 86 bpm for 10 minutes or longer) today. I also got my butt up and got at least 250 steps per hour every hour between noon and midnight (as of 11:38, yes, I’ve already gotten my 250+ steps in for that last one). My Fitbit is happy with me. I’ve gotten in all my goals today.

    Next step, do it again tomorrow.

    My Get-Up-And-Go Got Up and Went

    When I can’t seem to find the energy to even stand from where I’m sitting, I will often say that my get-up-and-go got up and went without me. I think it was from a poster or something my mom had when I was a teen. I remember a bear laying flat like it couldn’t even summon the energy to lift its head much less any of the rest of its bulk.

    I’ve felt like that quite a bit throughout my life. I’ve never been a high energy person. I’m easily more content sitting for hours reading than even a half hour spent walking. I have to make myself exercise.

    I am now in the midst of my third week of not being able to find the gumption to make myself. I don’t know of it’s the season and increase in darkness or my body finally having adjusted to the Prozac and shrugging it off or simply my own inability to keep anything up for more than about six months. Certainly something to bring up with my therapist.


    I don’t know what the heck is up with this week, but I can’t seem to get very far into gear, much less stay. I did do my one major project with the Lions for the back half of the year yesterday. We cover the morning at a local grocery store for the big regional food drive run by the local CBS affiliate out of Waco. Even though it’s the back half of what I’ve managed to establish as my sleep schedule, I went to bed early and got up stupid ridiculous early and was there. I even managed to not zombie through it. However, today I seem to be zombie enough and then some to make up for it.

    This whole week has been kind of like that. It’s been kind of hard to even get up and get my 250 steps per hour.

    New Start

    I’ve got the front page (blog) looking pretty much the way I want it to now. I’m still a little bummed I lost all my pics and posts, but I’ll deal. Next step, fleshing out the other pages.


    So I changed hosting, and had to install WordPress anew. Lost all my posts and everything. Oh, well. Gives me a chance to start again. So here we go. Pardon the mess while things are still being set up again.